Mom-to-Mom Moments – Parenting is Hard
For many years I stopped writing. It’s not that I didn’t have thoughts and ideas in my head, honestly it’s that parenting got really, really hard and I felt like a failure. I mean come on, being the daughter of parenting experts and “America’s Pediatrician”, I was supposed to nail this motherhood thing. Since I had so much support and so many tools at my fingertips, why was I not better at this?!? I couldn’t even figure out how to save my 14 year marriage. So I got quiet. And the self talk that I wasn’t enough kept me that way for far too long.
Not Worrying About My Imperfections
At this point in my life several things have shifted. One is that I just turned 40 and I am no longer scared of my imperfections or worry so much about what people think of me and have released the ideal of perfection. Thank God, because that was so exhausting. And in hindsight I am able to recognize and appreciate the many areas that I did, in fact, shine. That being the best mom I could be at the time was probably better than being the “perfect mom”. Also, with my youngest now being 8 years old I’ve realized that parenting is just dang hard no matter how great your situation. The fact that I was having challenges was because I was in the trenches with my kids and experiencing real life, and not that I was a failure. The fairy tale of a family with perfectly behaved and healthy kids where I could always be the nice, calm, beautiful, and a creative mother/wife has been shattered and replaced with the reality that the struggle is real. But that also it is the struggle that brings growth, depth, and quite possibly something truly worth sharing.
Embracing the Struggles of Parenthood
Now, being a single mom with three amazing kiddos ages 8, 11, and 14, the struggle is still there. The difference is now I’m not scared of it, but I embrace it and understand its value. Instead of feeling like I have to present a perfect front, I am compelled to continue my parents’ mission of helping support families in a way that is authentic to me. I can share my experience – the wonderful, the ugly, and the moments in between and THAT is enough. So, I offer up my Mom to Mom Moments – glimmers from the beautiful chaos that is my life.
Mom-to-Mom Moment by Hayden Livesay